I think I just got something

My mom has been telling me this for a long time but I didn't know what she was talking about.

My life has been sucky. For a long time. And I think my own personal problems have everything to do with the decline of civilization in our country. Whether it's crime statistics or illegal aliens or Britney Spears, it seems like my problems parallel and are influence by the downturn I think our country has taken. There are things that happen in my life that bother me to complete distraction that could easily be handled by people who are in a position to do something about it. And I don't understand why they don't care because, imo, if they don't do something about the little things when they're small then they become big things. And I know the things I'm going through are considered small potatoes to everyone else but I could not understand why.


When I would ask my mom, "why doesn't anyone care what's happening?" or "why is everything so screwed up?" She'd say "because of the war."

Now I interpreted that as 'well, since the United States is at war this country is going down the toilet because of the karma of bombing some other country'. Okay that's not what she meant.

It finally occured to me that the reason I can't get anything done, the reason there are no answers and no one gives a shit about anything I have to say is that a vast majority of the people I come into contact with probably have their minds on Iraq 24/7. You may be thinking "Duh!" but honestly I didn't think of it.

I don't know any soldiers. The fact is I don't really hang out with people. I do what I have to do, come home, and then that's it. I can't find a job so I don't circulate with other employees. So I don't really know anyone directly or indirectly involved in the war. I come into contact with lots of people every day but I don't know about their personal lives. It's very much a news story for me. Yes of course I think it's horrible. I don't think anyone should be dying, American, Iraqi, whoever. But in terms of it really being a present part of my life, it's not.

So it hadn't occured to me that the people I'm coming into contact with could be walking around like zombies because they're worried about someone over there and their minds aren't even in this country, let alone my town. I mean I knew people from around a depressed area like this would be over there fighting but I didn't really think about the people here. And that the crazy woman who can't give my information even though she works at an information desk might be like that because she's got a son over there who should have been home by now. I think about the war when I'm home watching the news reports not when I'n out trying to get normal stuff done. I just thought everyone was on psychiatric medications and that's why they were like that. I guess it could be both.

So does that solve my problems? No. But it explains it. It explains why people think I'm full of it. Why they think I worry about nothing. If you want to compare problems then they probably win according to any judge. But does that mean we're supposed to let this country go to hell in the meantime? Does it?